One fine evening when she saw me carrying a small box in my hand,
"Kak dila beli apa tu?"
"Buku." Smiling when I showed her a few books that were just delivered by the postman.
"Akak ni ulat buku betul la."
"Taklah. Ulat bulu je."
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Ever since my laptop had given up to perform the normal function (in other word: it is dead) I had to find the way to entertain myself. Not that I have nothing to do, in fact I have tons of case sheets to write, journals to fill in, homeworks that demand more writing plus all the books to read for upcoming exam. (None of it have been completed till now, especially the studying part. *sigh*) But all work and no play makes Jane a dull girl, no?
Truth is I just want to get away. I dreamed of vacations. But I can't just walked away so I found escapism in books.
****NERD ALERT****
So there's one book that I am reading, currently on page one-eighteen. Lets just admit it, I am in love with the book. I'm not sure it belongs in which genre. Young adult maybe?
"So this book, is it about mystery?"
"Nope."
"Is it like your 'circus book'?"
"No. The Night Circus is more like fantasy. This book, ummm.....its like..."
"Ok, what is it about?"
"...about this girl and this boy, they suffered from cancer."
The sentence abruptly stopped there though it continued in my mind but I just don't seems to find the right word to capture the essence of the book and I don't want to do injustice to such a nice book.
To be honest, this is just a normal book. Nothing mysterious or twisted as such. The characters are very much typical teenagers except that they are dying because of cancer. But I love how the writer brings the character to life, captures the souls, and it is beautiful and feels sincere enough. Beautiful tragedy?
No, it is not like Khaled Hosseini's book where it is full of tragic, heart-breaking moments that I have to take a break from it before I can continue reading the same book because it just too much of what my heart can take. No, it is not like Dan Brown's book where you unravelled the mystery and have an adventure as you heading to the last page. No, it is not a beautifully constructed romantic love story.
It is just a normal book about normal life, about the reality.
Like Markus Zusak said about the book,
" A novel of life and death and the peolple caught in between. You laugh, you cry and then you come back for more."
However, let just face it: I have not read much books in my life to make a great deal about it. I might be exaggerating of how good book is.
So, read and judge it as you pleased.
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This is how I feel after reading page one-nine-five:
I realised that as much as we want to live our dreams, to fulfil those dying wishes and do whatever it takes to succeed in life, it wouldn't hurt as much not to have what we called "dream come true" but surely it hurts like hell to hurt those who matters to us, to make their life miserable just to make things work for us.
Its like a grenade has exploded inside your heart, breaks all the walls you made, ruins everything you had and to make it worse, you might lose your dear one in returns for you unfulfil need, you didn't get what you want and they have to suffer because you are such a failure. And sorry doesn't seems to undo everything.
But then of course, those who truly loves you won't care much about it, to be with you during ups and downs of your life are more than enough though maybe you just taking advantages here and manipulating them quite a bit, but they do not care because they care about you so much.
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I have always love to read. Not those piles of medical books of course. I like to play around, care-free. Yet I made a decision a little while ago to join the medical course. The one that you ought to be serious and not-having-much-time-for-yourself kind of life, which mean a very less chances to indulge in good books again. (Not that you can play around with other people's life.)
But then again, maybe this is all I want despite all the things I hate about becoming a doctor. I mean it is nice to know that somehow you are needed in society.
Nota kaki:
- Pardon my horrible grammars, it must been a sore to the eyes to read those. If you are a grammar-nazi, you must be tempted to erase those and rewrite it in properly contructed sentences and grammatically correct. But sadly you can't do as you pleased as it is my writing. So just bear with it.
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