in the end we'll be alone

Tak lama lagi cik roomate nak pindah bilik single..
Aku pun sama..
tapi selama 3 minggu ni, aku akan duduk sorang-sorang kat tingkat 5 ni (senior’s wing)..
semua dah pindah..
somehow, i feel sad though i already know this would happened..

i hate the feeling of being left alone..
meninggalkan dan ditinggalkan, i wonder which is more hurtful...

i knew it..
i already knew it long before that we are bound to be alone..
one by one people sure will leave us.. willing or not, doesn’t really matter..
day by day, we have to start anew.. sweet or disasterous yesterday, won’t matter much..

sekarang tengah posting di Forensic Medicine and Toxicology punya department..
(they make us write the long name..)
Hari-hari pergi rumah mayat, tapi sebab hospital swasta maka takde mayat sangat..
Post-mortem pun jarang-jarang dan kalau ada pun kes yang dah admitted to hospital..
not some random case nor unknown bodies..

They showed us the cold chamber where the put the dead bodies..
There was no corpse at the moment..
They opened all the doors so you can see what’s inside..

Somehow when i look inside, i wonder how it feel to be left inside..
So cold, so dark and ALONE..

Alone in the closed space..

Claustrophobic!

But I’m already dead..

What can i do?

It was so dark that i couldn’t see anything..

I cried and cried but no one listen to me..

I am dead!

I heard voices...

They were so close..

I scream and scream but they couldn’t hear me..

I am really dead!

They said this is the cold chamber..
But they never mention that it is the torture chamber for the dead..
Because they never know how it feels to be the dead..

Kalau pun ada mayat lain kat dalam tu, it won’t be a company as a person would be..
Because it has no soul, just another dead body..
That’s how our soul matter much in life..
For us and for who lives around us..

Berpisah jasad dan nyawa, seumur hidup bersama ,bukti tiada yang kekal selamanya kecuali DIA...

source: tumblr

Allah turns you from one feeling to another and teaches by the meaning of opposite,
so that you will have two wings to fly, not one.

Tapi siapa kata kita seorang kalau kita ada DIA?

nota kaki:

• the cold chamber has compartment for lying dead or sitting position..